What would you advise your 16 year old self?

What would you advise your 16 year old self?  Goodness me, where would I start?  First and most importantly, that awful pink lipstick that I always wore, don't buy it, it was far to pale! Don't be a fashion victim either, just because it was the latest trend didn't mean you had to wear it, show of your figure, don't hide it under a massive coat (that makes me cringe just thinking about it)
Be nice to your mum and dad, their house isn't a hotel. Don't be lazy, tidy up after yourself. Don't take your family for granted, you've been blessed with a lovely family. 
Make the most of every opportunity, don't decline any invitation (unless it's with a boy that's a bit creepy).  Push yourself, do the best you can and have ambition. Oh and join a gym, get into the habit of keeping fit, don't let yourself go because you "can't be bothered", don't turn into a slob that parties too much (it was fun tho)
Don't let your heart be broken, life has a way of sorting itself out. Remember, things happen for a reason. Enjoy your life, enjoy being young, don't take it for granted. 
Every time you go out, laugh with your friends and put them first. 
Make the most of your education, be confident, you can do anything you put your mind too.  Think more carefully about how you want your career to pan out,  look to the future.  Did you know that you could be creative? No? Have a go at writing, a blog (a what?), a short story or even poetry! You might surprise yourself!
Try not to be quite so sensitive and sentimental, try to man up a bit, because it only hurts you. Carry on being kind to people though, that's a good quality. 
But most of all be happy, your life will have it's ups and downs, you will get through it and it will make you stronger. You're also gonna love being a mum, don't change a minute of that. And when you meet a good looking man called Pete, well all I'll say is you'll feel like life's began again for you!
But hey, you're only 16, you wouldn't listen anyway. If I remember rightly, you all ways thought you knew better, didn't you?(you little madam)
So, what would you advise your 16 year old self?

What shall I wear today?

"What shall I wear today" I ask myself, that daily question that's not always easy to answer. Today was easy as I wasn't intending leaving the house, jeans and a t-shirt will do. Yes, but which t-shirt? I have lots, all different colours. What colour do I "feel" today?( Well, I don't own a grey one). I think you should be able to wear different colour tops that have different mood meanings-:
Black- sexyish(never been worn)
Yellow-happyish
Grey- moody, don't talk to me
Orange-a bit confident
Pink-attentive (rarely worn)
Purple-Pre-menstrual (wolflike)
Blue-I'm ok, but a bit tetchy
Green-inpatient, very impatient
Brown-angry
Lilac- Get off,  I've got a headache
Multi-coloured-Beware, mood changeable 
The men would have to remember what colour meant what meaning, I think hubs would have to have a list on the fridge as he'd never remember!  Imagine though if your bloke was colour blind, and he thought you were wearing black (sexy) when in fact you'd worn the brown (angry) one! Whoops!
It's a good job I don't have an "occasion" to often, I own two dresses (that aren't too tight). I like wearing a dress but I'm not so good in high heels. I was in my younger days, but lately I've worn either pumps, training shoes, flip-flops or slippers, so when heels go on my confidence goes down as I imagine myself walking like a very drunk drag queen! (YOU'RE imagining me now aren't you, stop laughing)!
Men don't seem to have this problem with clothes though  do they? Why don't they? Is it because they don't care what they wear or maybe us ladies care too much? Are we trying to look for perfection or to look better than the other females? Our other half  just doesn't  understand, do they, I can't imagine why? So you've had to ask yourself "What shall I wear today"? (You actually said it out loud and your partner heard you and has done a runner)! It's Jeans and a t-shirt then! (Hmmm, what colour)?

Should I go on a diet?

"Should I go in another diet?" I ask myself that on a regular basis but never do anything about it as I actually don't believe in dieting! 
For many years I had a go at it, not properly, but with my limited knowledge ,I gave up very quickly. Why was it as soon as Monday morning came round and I awoke with the best intentions but it all went wrong.  I had to many obstacles get in my way! For instance-

Hubs was on a day off and had to have a full English breakfast (all fried of course) and my bowl of 
Bran flakes didn't look very appetising! Diet over ! 

My favourite biscuits had been half price at the supermarket and it would be senseless not to buy any, promising myself I would only have one a day as a treat as long as I jogged a few laps around the garden to work it off.  This is what really happened- I didn't have just one, I actually ate half the pack with my "just one more won't hurt" attitude and running around my garden was out of the question as it was chucking down outside, monsoon style ( it was spitting with rain and I could've dodged the drops!) Diet over! 
I have a bowl of Bran Flakes, only eat half because I don't like them and because I'm still hungry I devour 4 slices of hot buttered toast! Diet over! 

I admit, I'm not the best dieter in the world. I find the D word makes me obsessed about food and I can't stay out the fridge. But I'm not that much overweight (UK12) and I understand there are those that follow diets successfully. I take my hat off to them because we all know being overweight is not the healthiest way to live, we're not stupid but there are also sometimes underlying issues, medical or psychological, I understand that too.
But I think that "they" think  we are stupid! So many guidelines, eat your 5 a day, fish twice a week etc etc!
How did they manage years ago before we were told what to eat, they survived!(But years ago, McDonalds, Burger King and KFC wasn't in every town!) 
I think we all know what's healthy and what's not. (Slimming clubs are helpful , we have the internet or your Dr could refer you to a dietician if necessary)  I try to follow an 80/20 rule 80% healthy 20% naughty  as after I  was properly following a diet plan and lost the weight and came of it I slowly regained the weight plus a bit more! (My fault) Where did our obsession with dieting come from anyway? (That's a whole other blog)
So should I go on another diet? Not on your Nelly! (Now, where did I hide that chocolate!)

When do we turn into a grown-up?

Ok, so how DO we know when we become a fully fledged grown up? Is it when we reach 18?  In my case not (and probably all yours too), I worked full-time (one point for grownupness), but I went out every night, spent all my sort of hard earned money on alcohol, nearly always had an hangover and treated (mum and dads) home like a hotel.  Hmmm, that doesn't sound like I showed any sort of maturity at all now, does it?
Aged 21 I left home to move in with bloke, I felt more of a grown up then, even more so because bloke was so not.  At 22 I had my son, now I have to grow up a bit and be a mummy, just before son was one bloke left. So at 23 I moved house to somewhere bigger and better. I had a dining room, surely that makes me a grown up?
Life carries on, with and without grown up actions and before you know it you hit thirty. A very grown up and mature 30! So to celebrate, myself and a large group of friends went to see a male stripper and drank far too much sparkling wine! 
At 32 I meet hubs on another night out (I only partied once a month now) 
We still look back on that night and laugh as we were both very intoxicated. In time I make a grown up decision and son and I move into his house. Now I'm settled with my new family, definitely grown up. 
It became more apparent of how childish I could be  when we went to sons open evening at school. I chewed on chewing gum the whole time, well we wasn't allowed when I was at school. Then when we were sat opposite his form teacher listening in a mature manner to everything he said,  until teacher looked the other way, then me and son pulled faces at each other (hubs got mad with us, oops)!  My excuse, put me in a school again and I'm back to being fourteen and rebellious, I can't help it!
Hubs has always said that I'm the most immature person he's ever met. I hold that title with pride,  as I hit my  forties. I'm 42 now, which makes no sense to me at all! For example, we visited my sister in law the other day, she's just moved into a new home with her partner (he's called Charles and he's very posh), she showed me around with her daughter and hubs in tow. Her master bedroom is lovely with a beautiful view over the lake, boats sailing passed and the most gorgeous of homes on the opposite side. So what do I say?  " This is a good place to flash from"  I then lift my top up to show the neighbours and sailors my bra,  my niece (aged 20) couldn't believe what I'd done! Hubs laughed saying "I can't take you anywhere" and sister in law was in fits of laughter! 
So, when do we turn into a grown-up? Seriously, as I have no idea!

How do we choose a perfume?

Perfumes are a minefield, there is so many to choose from, it's nearly ridiculous!  Eau de parfum? Eau de toilette? What? I just want a spray that smells nice. Have you seen them all in the department stores?  It's near on impossible, you literally couldn't get around them all to try. 

So we have to do a bit of research first. It helps to have already come across the aroma on a friend, a young friend of course, you don't want to smell like an old lady (lavender is definitely out then?!). But imagine how horrified you'd be if she said it was Charlie of Lace ( do you remember those 80's scents that cost £2.99). So we'll forget that plan!
Next,  do we like floral or a musky tone?  Would we wear it day or night, (all us ladies have a special perfume that makes us feel like a sex kitten , don't we?), to work or to play?!! Ok, if we're paying that much then it's got to be for play!

We've made a decision on musky(not musty), we've all seen the adverts that make no sense! Why not advertise a perfume with oaky undertones (sounds like an ale), by a good looking oozing sex type of a man (or a fireman) just to inform us that if we wear the said perfume it'll give us guaranteed results! "Sold" I say!

I understand that the perfume companies are trying to sell us an image, if we wear their expensive smell then we also should be a size zero dripping in diamonds. Yeah whatever! Do we fall for that, we must do otherwise they'd be no marketing from them, though I always like a free sample!

It must be a hard task for our partners to buy us a perfume. "Who wore it" we ask, "oh, did she now?". Whether it's his mum or his secretary, he can't win, they HAVE to know what we like. 
So, how do we choose a perfume? Pftt, you tell me?

What shall I cook tonight?

"What shall I cook tonight" I ask hubs,( I don't know why I ask him as he always gives the same answer) he looks at me with a blank look on his face, he wasn't even listening! I repeat the question and he answers like I thought he would "don't mind", arghhh!

I take a look in the fridge then freezer (I'm bound to find something in there as it nearly full), I pull out every drawer, huffing and puffing, trying to make hard work of it, but there's nothing I see I fancy, so I throw myself back on the sofa, sighing so hubs takes notice. Plan didn't work, he's watching a war documentary on the History channel ( he changed channel whilst I had my head in the freezer-the cheek of it).
I tell hubs that I've no idea what to cook tonight, "we'll look later" is his response. Why can't I be more laid back like he is? I huff again!

I can't relax, this problem is a biggie and I need an answer so I text my friend and ask her what she's having for tea, I wait in anticipation for a reply, hoping she'll give me the inspiration I need, my phone chimes, I read the text "no idea "!
I gaze around the room, not sure why though, I'm hardly likely to find inspiration by looking at the mantelpiece, sideboard or curtains.

 So I head back to the kitchen, I'll make a cup of tea(that's the answer to everything). So I put the kettle on and gaze out the window, feeling very sorry for myself. 
Hubs had followed me in, he opens every door that has food behind it, including the stash cupboard (that's the cupboard we use to hide food from dearest son)," I don't know either" he says, (what blooming use was he?) I sigh some more. 
Nights like this are very frustrating, "how about a takeaway" hubs smiles, proud of himself as he's resolved the problem! Takeaway?
"I know" I squeal " I'll make a chicken curry" 
Problem solved, until tomorrow!

What's on your Bucket List?

We're never too young to have a bucket list, you know, the things you want to do before you kick the bucket!  My list is very long and I'm pleased to say some's been ticked off! 

I've visited Manhatten, waved to New York from the top of the Empire State, rode in a horse & carriage around Central Park, ( all on my 40th birthday) a big tick for that! Naked painting, tick! Rode pillion on a very fast motorbike, tick. 

Some of the items on my list are also on hubs too  (I've told Hubs that kissing a girl is not on my list)! For example, we want to drive around naked in a car, seeing a person (not young or elderly) walking along minding their own business, hubs would drive slowly at the side of them whilst I hit them with a big wet fish! (that sounded hilarious when we came up with the idea after seeing it on a TV advert, now it just sounds like we're a bit strange!).

A lot of the things we'd like to do is travel and see all the magnificent sites that the world has to offer (have any of you seen "An idiot abroad"- it's hilarious). 

When we pass over to the other side (I  mean die) I suppose what's important is what we've left behind, what family and friends think of us. I would of liked to have been famous for doing good things or inventing that product that would change our lives or for finding a cure for Aids or cancer but sadly I'm not that clever! I know  100 years after I've gone I will of been forgotten, as though I'd never existed.  That's sad but a fact of life, I'll just be a name on a family tree. So another newly added item to my bucket list is to leave something behind that I'll be remembered for, I better start thinking about that now, I'm only young (ish) but I think it may take a while!

 I need ideas about what to add to my list,  (I'm still not gonna kiss a girl!) not necessarily sensible(or even legal) but as I hope I've got plenty of years left I'll like to fill them with exciting, funny, strange, even bizarre experiences(I say that now but I might chicken out).  I suppose my list could go on forever as when we reach different ages we would maybe aspire to do or try new things. Hmmm!
So, what's on your bucket list?

Why me?

Why me?

Who'd of thought it? Not me that's for sure. I always thought things like this happened to other people, stronger people who could somehow cope with it, not me, I always thought of myself as, well, not necessarily weak but definitely not strong, I mean , get this, I can cry at anything, from the obvious sad movies to watching the coffins coming home of our boys who've been killed at war (that's justified sadness, not really to be compared with weepy movies).  What I'm trying to say is, I'm often over emotional, too nostalgic (no matter how much I wish it, my grown up son can't be a toddler again, not even for 24 hrs).
Certain folk have to deal with really tragic situations in their lives, finding out that yourself or a loved one has a terminal illness must be the worst thing ever. So I should think my self lucky!
Lucky that I have the most kind, caring and nearly perfect (well, he does snore) husband, a son I totally adore, great family and friends. In the whole scheme of things I have it all!  What have I got to complain about? 
Nothing actually because I've realised I am a strong person, in fact, stronger than most. Show me a problem and I'll find a solution. I will  (nearly) always look on the positives in my wonderful life and try not to dwell on the negatives. To those of you that are regular readers of my blogs will know, I have a sense of humour, I like to see the amusing, funny, take my mind of it side of things.  I'm a happy person, I'm always smiling, people have even commented on it. 
But I have a chronic pain condition,  for 8 years I've hardly had a day or night without some sort of pain. It has affected my life as unfortunately this pain is real and can't be ignored.  My strength is ever present because of a condition called Fibromyalgia (pls google it). This syndrome won't beat me though, I refuse to let it get the better of me, my symptoms often get worse so I just have to deal with it (it helps to have the support of my family, friends and twitter friends). 
I'm alive, I'm not terminally ill, but I'm also not making light of this relentless condition, a lot of people who suffer from it really do suffer. Normally my symptoms are ok, I can deal with it. 
 I don't want sympathy, heavens no, just for you to be aware of the not very pleasant fibromyalgia. 
Why me? Why not me!

Could you be a housemate on Big Brother?

Could you imagine it? Being watched 24/7 by a tv audience, every move you make, word you spoke, fart you farted(by the way, I don't fart)nose being picked(I don't do that either)itch being scratched, everything being scrutinised by the public, and your mum, and your ex(he better not sell a kiss & tell) and your nana! The list goes on, all those people who you dont want to know your business(including that teacher who said you'd come to nothing, well look at me now, I'm on the telly). The thought makes me shudder!

You'd meet all your housemates, obviously there would be a mixed bag, all very different. I would be the slightly older posh girl, with good manners who everyone loves as she loves all of them, I'd happily to the lions share of the housework, complete all the tasks and make everybody laugh(yeah right)!

I don't think I could live with that amount of people, some would smell, some would try to belch tunes, some would scratch there nether regions and one would just stare at you with starey type of eyes wearing thick back eyeliner and black lipstick and calls himself "Death".

No, thinking about it I couldn't be a housemate apart from the fact that my son would disown me, I just couldn't do it. There are certain things I like to do privately, things I don't even do in front of hubby(I'm not going to say what cos then he'll know). I take my hat of to those who do though, they all think they're going to be famous forever though and I do feel for there parents. But as a people watcher, I'll love every minute watching the goings on in the house, who fancies who, who hates who and who's a gorgeous hunk!

In the UK we've just had the celebrity version and a traveller(gypsy)won it! Tomorrow it's the normal(I say loosely) Big Brother which I'll be glued too(sorry hubs). I'm looking forward to seeing who I'll totally detest and can moan about for the next few weeks until they get voted out(I don't waste my money voting), and when they're interviewed afterwards I realise they weren't that bad after all and wishes they could go back in the house(I'm never satisfied)!

So, even though I could never be a housemate(even though it'd make me probably the most famous of housemates in the history of BB)my life will definately revolve around it! Well, I am strange, sad, slightly weird and totally immature, surely you expect nothing other!

What do you look for in a partner?

Blonde or dark? Tall or short? Blue eyes, facial hair, big muscles, big other things (feet, naughty). We all have a type we fancy and we're all different with our likes and dislikes. Some people have some odd things that they find attractive, a friend of mine would only date a guy if he wore a vest!
We start as teenagers, realising what we find attractive or not, whatever the case may be. I once dated a boy called Alan who I thought was really good looking and funny but what put me off was he ate a vol-a-vant with HP sauce on it (yuk) and then kissed me! Disgusting! I could've thrown up, so I dumped him! It hasn't put me off HP sauce, but I would never have it on a vol-a-vant!
I had a couple or so(10)boyfriends as a teen, all very different. I obviously hadn't worked out my type! My friends hadn't either, I think because we had posters on our walls of pop stars that we could of been looking for their dopplegangers, but I have to say, I never met anyone that looked remotely like John Travolta or Simon Le Bon. Which makes me wonder if we set our sights too high. Not that we are not attractive enough (I'm gorgeous) but the pin ups don't really exist in real life.
I used to like the tall, dark & handsome type but my hubs isn't tall or dark (in fact, he's nearly bald)but he is handsome, and funny, and he doesn't wear a vest!
I don't think there's anything wrong with having a "type" but if you only religiously stick to that, you're missing out on who could be the love of your life!
Not all men look like Michael Buble, and would we really want them too,(well, maybe) off course not, I met hubs and something just clicked. We understood each other, trusted and fancied each other, laughed all the time. So after all those years of wondering what I was looking for in a partner, it was easy, because whatever "it" was, my hubs had it!

How much do you like supermarket shopping?

I'm going to take a wild guess that the majority of you don't like supermarket shopping! I know that I'm odd, strange maybe, some say (in a polite manner) that I'm a bit quirky, I'm not really sure what they mean by that but I just smile anyway but I love supermarket shopping! It's makes me feel very grown up(I've even been known to put my best dress on for the occasion) I wander up and down the aisles, reading the back of the products checking the calories, fat, salt content etc feeling very proud (and slightly smug) that I've chosen the healthiest option. It's very important that hubs, son and myself eat fairly healthy, as I'm the main shopper and chef in our house I don't want to feel guilty if they have issues due to the food I buy, ( and i want to say right now that i dont call my husband "hubs" because it rhymes with tubs!!!!) it's a big responsibility you know! A grown up responsibility! Wherever I push my trolley (it hasn't got a wonky wheel, yay) the same couple are always in my way. They are looking at food labels as well, I say "excuse me please" as I reach for the (yummy) full fat milk, and the look of horror on their faces at me as they go for the skimmed milk makes me feel less of a grown up and totally inadequate so I quickly reach for the Soya milk, virtually fat free butter (?) and cottage cheese (vomit). I smile back at them feeling smug again (I also stick my tongue out at the perfectly behaved child that's with them when they're not looking). I totter of in my (too) high heels to the freezer dept leaving them with a crying infant! Singletons mill about at the frozen ready meals for one, the females obviously think this is a good place to find themselves a hunky single man to chat up but unfortunately for them its a ratio of 6-1, and that poor frightened looking young man senses what's occurring and grabs a sweet & sour chicken (for2) and makes a dash for the checkouts! Supermarkets are fun! Whichever aisle you walk down there are different personalities, different ages and different temperaments! I always feel sorry for the single mum with 4 kids all under 5 trying her best to get them to behave and the elderly lady whose obviously been widowed struggling to reach the top shelf. So next time you do your weekly/monthly shop, take a look around you. Give the single parent a smile, reach the top shelf for those who struggle to reach and if you're single, well hang about down the chilled aisles because there you get a better class of ready meal! You get me!

Would you like to be a millionaire?

I keep telling hubs that I'm gonna make us millionaires! How? I have ideas, not brilliant or even unique ideas but ideas all the same. "Just hurry up about it" pleads the hubby.
Idea No.1-Be the next J K Rowling, write a series of books for children that adults of a certain kind would read as well! I need an idea for the book tho, ummm, I better start thinking!(What about a boy called Barry Hotter that goes to a special school called Warthogs and he's taught magic and how to fly in a game called Baditch-I'm a genius)
Idea No.2-Sell my body, I don't mean prostitute myself, I'd be bankrupt v quickly! (I'd pay them not too) I mean to medical science, but thinking about that, they'd probably want me for free and dead!
Idea No3-I haven't got a third idea but I'm working on it!
I don't actually think I'll ever be wealthy, I'll never know what it's like to go to charity functions, or do lunch, or any of those other pastimes that rich people do!
Do I care? No(yes)of course not. I am rich in other ways. I have a hubby who totally loves me as much as I love him, the bestest son, supportive loving parents, great friends that I can rely on, a lovely home and plenty of food in the cupboards. Maybe if I was loaded my hubs would be an alcoholic, my son a drug addict, (I'd still have loving supportive parents)and friends that would only want me for my money!
I'm guessing being wealthy is hard work, and as a procrastinator that's not a good thing!
So, I think for the time being, I'll be satisfied with having "just enough".
I think just enough of everything is all we need to live a happy and contented life!
Isn't it?